Life is amazing. And then it’s awful. And then it’s amazing again.
Hi There. Oh Hi. Hey. Gosh, this is awkward….
After all, you may (or may not!) have noticed that I’ve been absent for a while. Okay, MONTHS. I took a summer break that turned into a reprieve that turned into a hiatus that turned into a sabbatical that turned into downright absenteeism. The Silver Lining is that I have been living life. Now, the truth of the matter is that I have been living life on life’s terms, which translates to amazing and awful and amazing; hence, the title of the post.
Here on March 1st, 2016, I find myself drawn back to writing on The Silver Pen. In all honesty, I have been thinking about it for quite some time, but have been feeling awkward, uncomfortable, confused and guilty for being gone for such a long time.
Guilt. Whatta word. Anyone else Catholic? My confirmation (at age 13) somehow seemingly confirmed that I was guilty – of what, I never knew, but if the Catholic church said I should feel guilty, then by golly I should. And did!
Should. Another word that I adopted at a young age and am now – finally (!), in my 40s – shedding like a snakeskin.
I digress. As usual. Some things never change….
The past months have brought joyous, painful, interesting and enlightening evolution. I have resisted writing because this transition has been organic, painful, joyous and profoundly real. I inherently felt the need to experience it rather than think about what I was going to write about or my next blog topic.
The thing about blogging is that for a period of time I was in a Grand Canyon-sized rut wherein I kept thinking, “I need to blog about this…” or “This experience would work for this topic…” These reflections made me feel a little cuckoo for coco puffs. In other words, I was living life on the surface – superficially – but not really living.
At some point last summer, my head, heart and soul refused to live in this duplicitous, superfical way. It took a summer trip to Europe – wherein I morphed from a caterpillar to a butterfly – to help me see the light and experience the miracles of mindfulness, joy and presence.
If you’re up for the ride, I’d love to resume our digital dialogue!
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